I cannot tell you what it looked like on the night, cos like-no-ways was I going to sit on a bridge at 10pm on a Saturday evening.

And I am rather thankful I did not. Tlale arrived 2.10 hours late - i.e. after midnight - on a motorbike and said, as way of apology, “This is the Nelson Mandela bridge, someone had to make an entrance”.

Darling, the only person in South Africa who is FAMOUS enough for such bad manners is the man the bridge is named after. And he’d never.

NICE CLOTHES. BAD ATTITUDE.

Sadly I did miss out on seeing Bold & Beautiful stars Steffy and Owen. Steffy is the International New Media Dynamo at Forrester Creations - currently under the evil eye of Bill Spencer, Steffy’s father’s current wife’s sister’s husband.

While we’re in this space. Here’s one of my fav games: MURDER, MARRY, SHAG? John Black, Bo Brady, Ridge Forrester. You have to choose, else I’ll give you a Chinese bangle.

YOUR OPTIONS

JOHN. Plus: Very Caring. Minus: Is in love with Lassie (AKA Marlena).

BO. Plus: Family Guy. Minus: Is in love with Fancy Face (AKA Hope).

RIDGE. Plus: Handsome Musician*. Minus: Is in love with Logan (AKA Brooke). And sometimes Doc (Taylor).